“The threat of your love in the headlights”

It’s time to confess – my most recent guilty pleasure has been watching The Bachelor. I caught up on the latest episode online tonight. My mom and sisters apparently have really gotten into it too, which is surprising to me. My mom will get on the phone with me and start chatting about his rose decisions. I have never seen a season of The Bachelor or The Bachelorette before now, but this one has been impressive from some reason. Naturally, he’s pretty cute (honest sidenote: I had a crush on a guy once that has a striking resemblance to him, weird), but the girls are equally intriguing. They all have their own strategies and fears and outstanding qualities. This episode he eliminated one more girl than he needed to, which added a dramatic twist.

Each and every one of the girls eventually crack and let some of their emotions out on the table (some sooner than others of course). While I’m sure they each want to appear to be calm and confident, on the inside they are all about ready to crumble. They have to balance between being interested and allowing themselves to fall for this great guy, while at the same time staying at a level that they will be able to bounce back with. Each week a few more go and they never know when it’s going to be them.

This lack of consistency has to be insane. I can’t imagine their relationship can ever truly grow in a healthy manner. Whoever this bachelor does decide to propose to at the end will have a tough time after all of the fireworks and glamour fade away. That woman will most likely always feel like she can never truly give of herself because they had to literally share him as their relationship developed.

Trust is such a crazy thing. It leaves you wondering if you’ll face rejection or deceit. No one wants to be that girl that feels duped because she was too naive to see what was happening all along. But then on the flip side, blocking out all love and emotion leaves you feeling more empty and unhappy, not to mention sends mixed messages to the one you have all of these feelings for. It’s not only the people on this ridiculous show that have to figure out how to maneuver through this, but everyone to a certain extent. Obviously, this show is an exaggerated example, which is why it is on television. Nonetheless, it is a hard thing to learn, and one that I still don’t have figured out.

Lyrics from Closing In by Imogen Heap